Alright, let’s talk about makin’ them easy bake oven pretzels, you know, the kind the young’uns love. I ain’t no fancy baker, but I can whip up a batch of these things that’ll make your mouth water. First off, don’t go gettin’ all highfalutin with the ingredients. Keep it simple, like me.
Now, some folks say you gotta have this special stuff called “lye” to make ’em taste right. Sounds like somethin’ you use to wash clothes to me, but they say it gives them pretzels that real pretzel taste. I dunno, I just use a bit of that dark syrup, whatchamacallit, malt syrup. Yeah, that’s it. Gives it a nice color and a good flavor, you know, like them pretzels you buy at the store but better, cause you made it yourself.

- First, get yourself some warm water, not too hot, not too cold, just right, like you’re gonna give a baby a bath.
- Then dump in some yeast. Don’t ask me what yeast is, it’s just some kinda magic powder that makes things rise up all fluffy like.
- Let it sit a spell, you know, let it do its thing. Then throw in some salt, gotta have salt, and some brown sugar. Not too much sugar, just enough to make it taste good.
Now, the dough, that’s the important part. You need flour, of course. I just use regular flour, ain’t nothin’ special. Mix it all together, and knead it good. You know, like you’re massagin’ someone’s back but with dough. Gotta get it all smooth and stretchy.
Some folks say you gotta boil them pretzels before bakin’ ’em. They say it makes ’em chewy. I say, it’s too much fuss. I just skip that part altogether, and they still turn out just fine. Chewy on the inside, and a little bit crispy on the outside. Perfect, if you ask me.
Then you gotta shape ’em, you know, twist ’em up all fancy-like. I ain’t too good at that, mine always look a little wonky, but they still taste good, and that’s all that matters. You can make ’em into sticks, or little circles, or whatever shape you want. The young’uns love to help with this part.
After they’re all shaped up, you gotta put ’em in the oven, not too hot, not too cold, just right. I don’t have one of them fancy ovens with all the buttons and timers, I just got a regular old oven, and it works just fine. Bake ’em till they’re golden brown, and then you gotta brush ’em with some butter. Butter makes everything better, you know.
And then, the best part, you gotta sprinkle ’em with salt. Gotta have salt, I tell ya. Big, chunky salt is the best. Makes ’em taste so good, you just can’t stop eatin’ ’em. But don’t eat too many now, they ain’t exactly diet food. They got a lot of whatchamacallit, calories, in ’em. And salt, too. So eat ’em in moderation, you know, like everything else.
These easy bake oven pretzels are perfect for a snack, or for a party, or for anytime you want somethin’ good to eat. They’re easy to make, and they don’t cost a lot of money, which is good, cause I ain’t made of money. And the best part is, you made ’em yourself, so you know exactly what’s in ’em. No funny business, just good, old-fashioned pretzels, like your grandma used to make.
So go ahead and try it, you might surprise yourself. And if you mess it up, don’t worry about it, just try again. That’s what I always do. And even if they don’t look perfect, they’ll still taste good, I promise. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go make myself another batch. All this talk about pretzels has got me hungry.

Homemade pretzels are the best, not like that store-bought stuff. You can make ’em just the way you like ’em, more salt, less salt, more sugar, less sugar, it’s all up to you. That’s what I like about cooking, you’re the boss. And when people eat what you made and they smile and say, “Mmm, this is good!”, well, that just makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, you know? It’s better than anythin’ you can buy at the store, that’s for sure.
Tags: [easy bake oven, pretzels, homemade pretzels, pretzel recipe, baking, snacks, easy recipe, soft pretzels, malt syrup]