Month: December 2024

Alright, let’s talk about this matcha lava cake thing. I ain’t no fancy baker, you know? Just a plain ol’ woman who likes good food. And this cake, well, it’s somethin’ special. First off, what is this “lava cake” anyways? Sounds kinda scary, like somethin’ that’s gonna explode in your mouth. But nah, it ain’t like that. It’s just a cake, see, but with a ...

Alright, let’s talk about these Jamaican patties and coco bread, eh? I ain’t no fancy chef or nothin’, but I know what tastes good, ya hear? What are these Jamaican Patties Anyways? Well, from what I gather, these patties, they’re like… um… pastries, yeah, filled with some kinda meat or somethin’. They call it “savory fillin’,” sounds fancy, but it’s just spiced-up meat, I reckon. ...

Okay, so you wanna bake some Halloween goodies, huh? Well, let me tell ya, it ain’t just about flour and sugar. You need the right tools, or you’ll be messin’ around like a chicken with its head cut off. I’ve seen it all, folks tryin’ to make spooky cookies with butter knives… Lord have mercy! First off, you gotta have them cookie cutters. Not just ...

Alright, let’s get this straight, I ain’t no fancy baker or nothin’. But I do know how to make some good einkorn biscuits with cream, the kind that melts in your mouth and fills your belly. You city folks with your fancy recipes and gadgets, you can keep ’em. I’m gonna tell you how to make biscuits the old-fashioned way, the way my mama taught ...

Alright, let’s talk about this chickpea flour bread. I ain’t no fancy baker, mind you, just an old woman who likes to eat good food, and this here bread, well, it’s somethin’ special. You know, I heard about this chickpea flour, and I thought, “What in the tarnation is that?” Sounded like somethin’ for them city folk. But then my neighbor, bless her heart, she ...

Well, let me tell ya, about this here… uh… Chinese cake fruit thingy. I ain’t no fancy baker, mind you. I just make stuff that fills the belly and tastes good, ya know? Like them… whatchamacallits… fruitcakes. Yeah, that’s it. But these ain’t your grandma’s fruitcakes, I tell ya. Not the ones with all that sugary stuff that makes your teeth hurt. These Chinese ones, ...

Alright, let’s talk about bakin’ bread, ya know, the kind you make at home. Not that store-bought stuff, tastes like cardboard half the time. I’m gonna tell ya what I know, and it ain’t fancy, but it gets the job done. First off, you gotta have somethin’ to bake it in, right? They call ’em molds, or pans, whatever. I just call ’em bread pans, ...

Alright, let’s talk about them belvita sandwich cookies. You know, the ones they say are good for breakfast? I seen ‘em at the store, all colorful and whatnot. Folks grabbin’ ‘em like they’re the best thing since sliced bread. But are they really all that good? Let’s see. First off, they got all sorts of flavors, like blueberry and what have you. Sounds fancy, right? ...

Alright, let me tell you about this… this egg thingy, yeah, egg tartar. My old man, he used to say, “If it ain’t got eggs, it ain’t breakfast.” But this ain’t no breakfast I ever seen. First off, they got this… steak tartar. Now, I ain’t never eaten nothin’ raw in my life, ‘cept maybe a carrot fresh outta the garden. But these fancy folks, ...

Alright, let’s talk about this bakin’ powder stuff, you know, the thing that makes your cakes all fluffy and nice. I heard you young folks call it “1 tbsp baking powder in grams” or somethin’ like that. Sounds fancy, but it ain’t nothin’ complicated, I tell ya. What’s this “tbsp” thing anyway? Well, lemme tell ya, this “tbsp” thing, it’s just a big spoon, like ...